mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Randomize
