dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
just had to explain to the health center why i wanted 50 condoms a month.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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