I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
