and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
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