"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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