Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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