I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize
