Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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