dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
