Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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