You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
