we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
