Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
Randomize
