It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
