I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
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