ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
