when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
