do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
