I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
