Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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