dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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