I'll bet she douches with gravy.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
