Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Houston, we have a blender
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
