Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
