No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
