im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
