I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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