my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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