he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
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