wat bout pragnant strippers??
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
