There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
Randomize