I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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