The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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