That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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