He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
