That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
