and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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