I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize