In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
