Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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