i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Randomize
