So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize