Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
