i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
