Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
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