five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
