I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
