you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
