Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
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