is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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